Category Archives: Personal

Whenever I see something that obviously took a lot of time to put together, but doesn’t fall into the normal realm of what would be considered anybody’s normal day job, I always think this to myself. I just saw this YouTube video, and was about to reply this tired phrase to the person who sent me the link. But as I typed “Wish I had that kind of free time” I realized that in fact, I do. I have …

I’m told the middle weeks of January are historically the coldest part of the Minnesota winter. Right now the weather is definitely living up to that reputation. Although truthfully, I don’t really care about temperature. Cold is cold. Once you get below 20º F, it’s all a wash for me. Truthfully, I don’t really mind the cold and I greatly prefer winter’s layered fashions. This region’s maternal axiom is “There’s no such thing as cold weather — only insufficient clothing.” There’s a …

I’m a scooterist at heart. I love the sheer economy, the rich and quirky history, the goofy subculture, and how easy it is to just chuck a scooter around town. I pull for the Mods when I watch Quadrophenia. My first scooter was a Vespa P200E, and one of the first things I did was paint a Union Jack on the tire cover. Even now I’d really like to get a Stella and completely mod it out — cover it in mirrors, lights, and british iconography. Then find myself a ratty green parka and put some armor in it. However, mod aspirations aside, I must admit a deep, dark secret.

Lately, I really want a Café Racer.

Day Three — No really, it’s a scooter obstacle course. After the thrill of blocking had run its sharp half-life through my system, I found myself once more at BlueCat Motors. The ride went great. No major incidents, nobody that we know of got lost or separated. Nobody wrecked. Pretty much everybody had a great time.

There is really only one thing about RMB that I could complain about. When there’s an activity, such as a meal, it needs to really get going right away. There were two activities at BlueCat Motors — the “pig roast”, and the gymkhana. In both cases, neither got going with any sort of expediency. That ended up being a real detriment to both events. People didn’t know when food was happening, and it actually interrupted the start of the gymkhana. And once the gymkhana eventually got rolling again, people had pretty much lost interest if they hadn’t up and completely left. Which is too bad because it was pretty darn entertaining.

Day Three — Blocking is my new favorite thing. Last year, when I attended the Rally without a scooter, I had a great time. My favorite part was the gymkhana — a scooter obstacle course and no, I’m not making that up. What I didn’t do, because I was sans-scooter, was participate in any of the group rides. I didn’t have the nerve to ask anybody to let me ride cupcake, so I pretty much just sat that part out. Boy was I missing out!

Here’s the thing. All practical use aside, riding a scooter is really, really fun. The only thing more fun that riding a scooter, is riding a scooter in a group. I learned this months ago after joining the Heck’s Angels, only to have it further reinforced during what I can only describe as Pizza Lucé rides. There’s something really exciting about zipping along with a group of a dozen or so scooterists, in staggered formation, all growling and snarling in the least intimidating manner possible. The looks you get from other cars, from pedestrians, and other 2-wheel riders are just classic. Basically, it’s a big grin parade.

Day Two — “Hey Marty, hold up!” No sooner did we return from the history ride was it time to head over to Scooterville for the evening rides. This would be the first time most of the rally group would converge. Four separate rides would leave Scooterville around 7:00, weave their separate routes, and then re-converge upon BlueCat Motors in St. Paul.

Scooterville sits on a little U-shaped street that leaves and then re-joins Cedar Ave. There are several bars and clubs on this U and even another motorcycle shop. So whenever you’re at Scooterville, there’s always something coming around the U to get back onto Washington/Cedar/Minnehaha Ave. While we were gathering for the evening ride, some guy rolled up in a Delorean tricked out in fabulous Back To The Future fashion. I would hope that there’s even a Flux Capacitor inside. What was even more entertaining though, was how at least half a dozen people with cameras in gun holsters rushed the street to grab a photo of the guy as he waited to turn at the stop sign. I bet he gets that a lot.

Day One — A year ago, my scooter obsession hit fever pitch. I have always loved the idea of scooters ever since I saw my first Honda Elite when I was a kid. It looked like a spaceship. Like a spaceship that could take me anywhere. I also distinctly remember a credit card commercial from my youth where a blonde musical artist, whose name escapes me, was so proud that she’d found the perfect vintage Vespa for her husband. “He’s just going to love it.” I remember being completely enamored with that sky blue, curvy Italian dream machine and wishing that she were surprising me with it instead.

But one year ago this week was when I attended the 2007 Rattle My Bones Twin Cities Scooter Rally. I registered, paid my $25, got my wrist band, bought raffle tickets, observed the gymkhana, all without actually being a scooter owner. But whilst I lurked, I talked to a plethora of people about what they were riding and what they’d recommend to a new rider like myself. What I didn’t expect was to find such a rich subculture of scooterists and such an active community here in the Twin Cities. Three months later I was the proud owner of a curvy, silver Italian “wasp” that had been ’round longer than I’ve been alive. Fabulous.